Fox News’s Sean Hannity was joined by Rachel Campos-Duffy and Jason fucking Chaffetz to address the central issues that Americans are facing this holiday season: Gov. Tim Walz’s Christmas tree.
And they threw in some tampon jokes, too.
It bothers conservatives that Walz signed a bill requiring public schools to provide menstrual products — including pads and tampons — to students in 4th through 12th grade. To conservatives, girls are icky when they have their periods, and they should just bleed on themselves.
Hannity noted that Tim and Gwen Walz released what he called “this incredibly, kind of cringeworthy video while decorating their Christmas tree,” Media Matters reports. Hannity didn’t like the Walz’s homemade star on their tree.
“My only question is, Rachel, I wonder if they put any feminine hygiene products on the tree, number one,” Sean said. “Number two, I wonder if they’re burning tires outside their homes so they can get that smell of freedom back that they love so much.”
“Yeah, this was so cringe, it almost felt like SNL,” Campos-Duffy said. “By the way, notice how they don’t call their tree a Christmas tree; it’s a “family tree.” These guys were such communists.”
“I have to tell you, we really dodged a bullet, not just with Kamala but also imagine if this was the vice president and his second lady,” she continued. “I mean, these people are very strange. And it’s weird, remember they went around saying JD Vance was weird. This is weird.”
Fact check: JD Vance is weird.
“But I do wonder, I mean, what did they decorate the tree with?” Sean asked. “I mean, if they believe so much in feminine hygiene products in boys’ bathrooms in school, why wouldn’t they put it on their Christmas tree?”
Fact check: Trump signed a 2018 package that requires federal prisons to provide menstrual products.
“Well, they put a toilet paper roll on top. I mean, they’re just — there are just some things that you’re not supposed to share with the whole rest of the world,” Chaffetz said. “I mean, this is so embarrassing. The contrast couldn’t be bigger.”
“You’ve got freedom ringing out, you’ve got people chanting “USA,” they’re feeling, you know — they’re talking about patriotism with Donald Trump,” he added. “Meanwhile, we go to the Walz basement or wherever they’re at; I mean, it’s like taking the green casserole from Thanksgiving. You got to take it out of the fridge, and at some point you just have to throw it away. And that’s what we need to do here.”
I have no idea what Chavetz means. I cannot translate Turnip into English. As for calling it a ‘family tree,’ that’s not weird. I grew up in an uber-conservative Evangelic family, and we called our trees ‘candy trees’ because my mom would make homemade candy, wrap them in cling wrap, and hang each one on the tree for us. All I’m trying to say is, what the fuck is wrong with these people? I want to send Sean a box of tampons since he’s obsessed with them. I try to be helpful like that!
