The Hand Job Beetlejuice Lady Praises Jesus After Her Primary Win


Controversial Colorado Rep. Lauren Bobert (R-Carpetbagger) spoke to supporters at a watch party in Windsor to tout her Christian bonafide after her primary win against a handful of Republican candidates even though the gun-toting pro-police Congresswoman, her husband, and her son have a rap sheet. This isn’t the first time the Beetlejuice groper has feigned her moral compass.

I’m concerned about the people in the 4th Congressional District in her state. Are y’all OK? We’re here for you! Well, maybe she promised them all hand jobs while preaching about the Bible.

The Daily Beast reports:

“Tonight we had a priority, and that was to glorify and honor God. To praise the name of Jesus, to invite the Holy Spirit to be present, not only in this room, but in Colorado’s 4th District, throughout Colorado, and throughout the United States of America!” she said.

Boebert beat her five opponents to claim victory after switching districts. Her win came despite a series of humiliating scandals that cast doubt on her ability to win back in the 3rd District, where she’d only narrowly won re-election in 2022. Since then, she has divorced her husband in a high-profile split that on at least one occasion prompted a call to police; been thrown out of a Denver theater for vaping and getting a little too handsy with her date; and then lied about the embarrassing incident before surveillance footage proved her wrong and forced an awkward apology.

She wasn’t done praising her version of Jesus.

“We know that our rights come from God, not corrupt politicians. Your rights that you have been endowed with are not the government’s to legislate away, to reason away, to purchase away, and that is what I will always continue to fight for,” she said.

That sounds like a pro-choice statement. Thanks, girlfriend! You’re the best.

She’s done this before.





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